Some People Simply Make Me Uncomfortable

I'm sure we all have people that we are uncomfortable being around, and I'm sure the reasons are varied. I recently made a list of the types of people that make me uncomfortable and what I noticed surprised me. With each and every single one, there was a connection that boiled down to one simple thing. Can you figure it out?

• Outgoing/Blunt people
• Skinny people
• Authority figures
• People I don't know, but am expected to mingle with
• Competitive people

It all boils down to fear of failure, ladies and gentlemen. Maybe not initially, but I can pinpoint each and every single discomfort I feel around these people, down to fear of failure.

Outgoing people are confident in themselves. They know their strengths and weaknesses and simply accept them as they are. They also often don't think that other people are any different, so this, many times, makes them blunt. If someone asked them, "what were you thinking when you put that shirt on today?" they'd most likely shrug and say "I like it. You don't have to look at if you don't like it." But someone like me would fret over that comment for hours or days thinking "Yeah, I should've picked the ____ shirt instead." And feeling like an idiot because I don't know how to dress myself. FAILURE 

Skinny people are the worst. Not only are they able to flounce around in clothes that fit perfectly, look proportionate... and no matter how ugly inside they are, they still manage to have those of the opposite sex fluttering around them like bugs to light bulb. Then on top of that they have the nerve to say to you "You aren't fat, I'm fat. See?" and then proceed to pinch SKIN around their middle, paying no mind to the fact that you could pinch 10 times that amount of fat off your own middle. Not to mention, that fat people aren't taken as seriously as skinny people. I mean, who wants to rely on someone who can't even control how much food they put in their mouth, let alone put in charge of a major work project. Again, fear of FAILURE.

Authority figures are the boss. They are in charge and it's up to them, especially in the workplace, to determine how good of a job you are doing. Even when I'm not doing anything wrong, they make me nervous, because I just know they found something that I DID do wrong. FAILURE

Mingling with and meeting new people. I suck at communication. I'm much better at listening. When I am tossed in with people I don't know and somehow expected to talk to them, my heart almost pounds out of my chest. I never know what to say, to do. It's like stage fright, only I don't have a script, I just have to ad lib. You know where I'm going with this.... FAILURE

And of course, competitive is the most recognizable here... fear of losing whatever competition this other person had dreamed up in their mind. And most of the time these people have little competitions going on inside their heads and you don't even know about it! So, then I'm wondering what kind of things I'm losing at and don't even realize it!

So basically, all this means is that I've got to work on my self-esteem. Figure out how to be that person that says "Oh well" and can simply leave it at that.

I'm working on it... but it's a long road.